Azizan's Blog

i jus realised tt some of the things i wrote in this blog maybe offensive to people but sorry guys, its jus my personal view... I aint guilty of anything i said.. im not afraid... i WILL speak my mind.

all i can say tt the facts mentioned r all true, no gimmick, no make-up stories n no lies...
if u knew me personally.. i am an expressive person... im not afraid to give my personal view... haha! its a good reflection of me.. its me!

i particularly notice this when Yaz was at my blog n some things i said were harsh bout him but its all true... its wat i feel n think at that point of time.. glad he dun care wats in de past!
actually i find it interesting to read all the past post to have a 'feel' of how i feel at tt moment of time...

In conclusion, i jus wanna make it clear tt this blog is GENUINELY ME!! tts rite.. im not afraid to voice out.. its my blog, its my rights to publish whatever i want. Sue me for defamation, slander or libel if you want cos i can be 100% sure i will win this case! haha

sigh** im supposed to see him..

gosh.. its Saturday!!! supposed to be his book-out day but he having field camp... gosh im miss my baby botak.. haiz...
really miss him... didnt even get to talk or receive an sms from him!
its sad.. so sad.. right now, feeling the same as YY.. we're helpless galfrens pining for our love ones... haiz, i sound so emo... but of course, i am now... really in an emotionally mood...
feelings of worry were present also... i really wonder hows he doing in jungle n fasting at the same time.. gosh, i hope he have the strenght to go on... n hope he be fine too!!

hmmm... chill day today, a day full of sleep, Tv n vcd watching... cool.. lepak only. im crazy~
jus now went to geylang... Packo!! argh.. those elder people may be old but they're damn pushy.. gosh... i dun mean to be rude but they're rude, shovering their way thru n pushing pple aside! urgh! spend $15 on street food alone... bought dengdeng, cookies, chicken wings n etc. OMG im addicted to dengdeng.. so nice!

on bus return trip, there's this very cute baby boy who keep looking back at me den started smiling n laughing n drooling... so cute!!
den the guy who hold tt baby offered if i wanted to hold him... ohhh im so tempted but dun wan la later the baby cry i paiseh la... hehe
den the guy was like using the baby to get my no... haha.. he seem nice but nah i cant, im attached... still remember tt baby.. he's damn cute!!

haaaaaaaaa....... another pic tt i adore... *winks* 

hey who's tt?? OMG, tts me... disgusting... lol... but i find it style... haha 

Tourism Law: DOWN!!!

today's THL paper went off fine....
hehhe.. was easy.. hmm oklah i can do all but no gurantee of getting all ans correct though!
so excited cos i didnt study but i still manage to do it.. yay!

ok so now, 2 down 3 more to go!!
wahaha... im so excited! cant wait for all to be over

jus now at exam room, i notice there's this part-time student who keep looking at me then suddenly he turned ard n smile n ask me, " u fm ngee ann kan?" im like shit!! he knows me.. n i hv sweets in my mouth. hehe i tot i can get away wif the sweets cos my frens mostly chinese so its ok, but the guy spotted it... BUSTED!!
he den turn ard again n ask, "name sape ah? sorry i forgot la.." i stumbed. it took me a few seconds b4 i answered him. in my head, i was like.."shit! i dun even recognise who u r n apologise for forgetting my name.."
haiz.. gosh.. Azizan getting old... bad memory....
throughout the paper i keep thinking, trying to figure out who he was... must be my senior in sec sch but who?? till now... still wondering. Curiousity kills me!! argh!
n stupid me didnt ask him back cos i left for toilet right after the paper...

Tonight, will be watching IDOLS... still voting for Taufik!! there's the Champion n OC too.. wow!!

its gonna be my last late-night calls to Ir tonight cos he going field camp tmr morning n only be back by next Thurs night. i think dun really talk later cos he needs to pack his stuff n wake up real early tmr. Nov 1 is our 24th mth anniversary n he's not there... cant even sms or call.. haiz.. he's always not there on impt occasions such as my bday... *sigh*

wahaha.. look at tt.. another "act cute" photo.. wahaha... but i like... *giggles* 

wahahhaha.... look my hair.... its damp n messy but i find it cool.. hehe.. lurve this stupid pic.. 

Financial Management: DOWN!!

hey hey.... 1 down, 4 more to go....
lets go!! its amazing how time flies....

FM paper was ok, but i made stupid careless mistakes which cause the whole qn wrong n i found out tt marks r not given for formulas written... Abit sad la...
i estimated that i will failed the exam but nevertheles i'll pass this module. Im confident of that! Haiya... passing is fine wif me! Really cant stand pple who keep whining bout the paper when its OVER!! irritating pple... they go like.. "oh no... i lost 4marks on this... oh no i dunno how to do this qn, tt qn... n so on...." Shut up gals, jus shut up! its not tt u will fail anyway....

Well.. well... Tourism Law up next! Hadnt really study but i wont wanna stress myself too much. Jus do wat i can.. I cant wait for all the papers to be over!

Jus now went to Tiong Bahru Plaza to eat at LJS wif Ven, Jo n Wendy... yup i didnt fast but the LJS is so isolated right inside no one can spot me!! Haha...

Ven commented tt I always end off my entries wif me missing him... haha.. its not a procedure, its personal emotions... i really do MISS him everyday though i get to converse wif him via phone....

My Lovely Weekends...

WOW!!! my weekends was great despite me fasting n exams coming....
Haha.. Im crazy. Still enjoyin... when exams starts this Tues... muahahaha

Friday

okies... so I went to sch for tutorial but of course, typical Azizan as tardy as always, I came late on tat day so i dun really study wif them at 11am. Haha...
To my suprise, miss jolyn not there yet!! She lives the nearest but lately she's the lastest to arrive! Did some reading n updating.... (gossip la... haha) den went for class...
Wasnt really paying attention cos we're seated at back row n i cant see. Wong YY la, he go n combine class wif some SCM class... But ok la, manage to ask him one qn tt i dunno how to do.
Got my CAs marks for FM, scored fairly well. After calculations, i only need to score 28% of exam paper to pass FM!! Woohoo.. horray!! yippy!!
So ok... now... bad news... im abit too complacent....

went straight hm to rest n sleep for awhile then break fast n its TV time all the way fm 7pm to 12midnight. Oh btw, Maia was voted off. Unexpected. But well, someone has to go... Me n sis was watching it n we both thought Taufik going out but when gurmit says "Group B, u're safe!!" we both scream in excitement... wahaha... its so loud... so happy seh he still in... I dun think i still be watchin if he's out. He's got the flow baby....

well tts all for Friday....

Saturday

Was so tired from late night chatting wif darling n had to wake up so early cos Im meeting him.. yay!! was waiting so long to see him again. He gave me a ring at 9.30am telling me to meet at 10.30am... haiz... im so lazy n tired to wake up but dun wanna upset him. So we met meet Jabir at GV Tamp... Oh gosh, Bir is so handsome now... he looks so much better! A new discovery on tt day, TM has this new extended area near the toilet area at level 4. Cool, got small stage there to host events i guess!

Went to Ir's house cos he wanna get changed. He was so tired he went to sleep. He looks so cute sleeping so soundly. I was supposed to be studying too, but i was so tired i sleep on the chair.. haha. Never really study. Break fast at his hm n off we go to Geylang Bazaar... There, met up wif his bunkmates n go walk ard. Sadly, didnt really walk much cos its raining n its jus overcrowded wif alot of pple.. nvm, we sat at McD to drink n chill. Boy, we ate alot... haha

A short day spend wif Ir but enjoyin every moment of it.

Sunday

haha.. woke up really late! yest came back so late den had to do housework... everyone overslept n didnt eat in the mornin.. wahaha... luckily i ate somethin n had chocs at ard 2am.
Had a talk wif mum when she ask me bout Amir n I, i finally told her tt we're back 2gether. She says Im crazy... wahaha... in my mind, i was thinking "yup im crazy, im crazy in love..." Well i guess she understand wat love can do to us... makes us crazy n stupid sometimes... hehe
Was smiling when she wasnt strongly against it, in fact she's ok wif tt. But seemed a'lil worried.

Well... well.. told Ir bout it n he was so happy to hear tt too!! hehehe...
My fam n I went to Geylang Bazaar to walk ard n we bought alot of stuff hm. I myself bought 2 baju kurungs, a white n a purple one.. feel so indonesian... hehe. Everyone bought at least one.. so we're all happy! Ate alot too but tts normal every Sunday... So happy im brought up this way, Every Sunday is our Family Day!! im loving it...

Oh btw, some thing funny happens... we're at 1st Lady den i happen to like this grey baju kurung. Was so lazy to line up n wait for the fitting room, i jus slip the top on outside.. wahaha... the top Fits well! it was size XS but i feel tt the bottom was abit too small for my gigantic butt!! Mum came up wif a cheeky idea of changing the bottom to size S n i tot tt was a brilliant idea. so she went ahead to look for similar set n switch the bottom... wahaha... But later at the cashier, the lady found out tt they're of diff sizes... haha BUSTED!! mum n i started acting like we hv no idea its switched.. haha.. i claimed tt it was like tat when i tried them on... the lady said it cant be sold at diff sizes so in the end we didnt purchased it n left.. wahaha.. we all had a gd laugh.. yeah rite mummy! trying to ask smart...

i had great fun shopping for clothes at Geylang... n sis, finally got her Lobster($18). It was everyone's first attempt to eating lobster too... tasted good. n me.... i found out my menses jus came... so i wont be fasting tmr onwards but im suffering fm cramps now... haiz...
at times like this, im pining for Amir even more cos he's always the one to comfort me....
He wont be out till Nov 6... will miss him lots! Nevertheless... i'll still be here waiting...

i didnt study n exam on Tue n i dun seem to worry....k its 3plus am n im in pain... wanna go sleep.. Zzzzz.. Peace out.

FM is damn tough!

Finally.....
i got down to study FM...
damn! its so tough to understand the concept...
only manage to do 2 topics on FM n its so hard!!

haiz....
demoralized....
how to cover so many topics(bout 8 more topics) for exam n tts only 1 module... 4 more modules i hadnt even touched on yet!! screwed... so screwed... show me the light plz...
my hope is tt tomolo during FM tutorial i be able to clear my doubts n understand better but there's only so little to cover in mere 2hrs with Wong YY. haiz...
tomolo meeting Ven YY n Jo at 11am so can revise n discuss b4 tutorial....

Almost everyday, i be spending my nightime sitting watching tv n munching.... den i be anticipating anxiously but patiently for my hp to ring...
its been like tat ever since i dunno when....
gosh i miss him so much... cant wait for Sat to come...

SianZ... argh.. Study? NOW?

wow... its almost a week of fasting but i think im getting lazier.. wahahaha...
everyday, sleep sleep sleep. Jus read one topic.... zZZZzzzzz ... there i go again... sleep!!

Haiz... sleep only cannot control it ah. Im the type who cant study. Jus damn lazy!! Urgh!
Sickening jus cant keep my head up n study, jus give me 20mins in there i go sleeping again.
No drive... no motivation....
If i on the music, i be singing n dancing like some sick women. End result still the same, i wont be studyin... I really am wondering y am i not panicky.. haiz...

Oh pple often say fasting can make u lose weight. Its bullshit!! crappy seh, i find myself putting on more weight. argh!! im 56kg now. Overweight already cos im only 1.52m! Dammit.
Sleep.. eat(sahur).. sleep... watch tv.... bathe... sleep... eat(buka)... tv... sleep!

Wah so pressurising to know tt pple all started studyin already. Hate it when pple put pressure on me cos im always the chilll one, but when i this happen i be rushing like shit. Jus now went to sch for Law tutorial, Ervin was beside me den i ask him wats the ans for past yr exam paper n he probe me a qn "wah u havent study ah?" hehehe... *smiles*
Im the type dun care bout my grades but at least its a gd pass la. Gd enuff.

was looking thru the past yr papers.... flip flip flip... im in daze! deep shit. i hv no idea how to answer them... wahahaa.... ish ish ish... was thinking "ish.. camne ni nak buat ni paper.. mampos Zan, mampos... ni dah gile abis!"

Ala..... y must i study now?? Haiz... bodoh la... I guess I hv to la cos weekends I wanna go out with Ir... his last book out before his jungle camp or somethin. N he havent called me yet today... I wanna talk to my baby....

Anyway, was at Fadz blog jus now... haha... i finally found put wat Parkour is! Le Parkour.... cool but maybe not for me, im not up to do such stunts. I wanna go climb ah, go swim or running, kayaking or something. Feelin damn fat, lazy n lethargic! Den i went to learn basic french. Je t'aime..( i love u) hehe..

Wahaha.. dun wanna study but dun wanna forward. I cant accept failure in my studies too! I never fail exams before, i dun wanna make a new record. No no NO! Someone giove me spanking!! Give a hard one plz... oh wait, maybe a slap in the face. That'll do. WAKE UP!! Haiz.. a disadvantage when u hv parents who dun give u any pressure at studies at ALL...
Futhermore, I jus realised its my last Sem Exam, next Sem no Exams... Jia Yo... Azizan Samsuar GO STUDY!!

we're back together

i can feel the love i can feel the bond

but i jus dun understand y u hv to feel insecure

when im giving u my all

when all i think of is only u

Trust me

i let u go off once, im never letting u go again

anyway, im tt attractive for u to worry

there's nothing to worry... really

im really wondering y he hv to worry so much when he knows i'll always be true to him n tt i love him soo much. I understand his insecurity cos he's not here with me, but i promised i'll take care of myself n not to let anythin to cause harm to our relationship. Even when ur in camp u'll alway be in my heart n mind....

me at bus-stop.. oh wow... look at the car behind me... cool effect! 

tts me... 

on fri i went to my grandma's house... so unfortunate i broke my shoes when i took them off, had to use my granny's slippers home! Haha so funny cos im wearing so formal, luckily my bro offerred to take cab hm. Oh yah, CM presentation went ok la... wow so nice, everyone wore so formal with blazers n everythin... oh btw, owe Raf for the nice floor plan he help us to draw!

My aunts n cuzzins all there on fri, somehow i feel tt they kinda of treat us(me, my bro n sis) like some kinda of spoilt brats!! OMG.. tts a complete NO NO!! ape saje la drg, ingatkan we feed on gd food n stuff... so merepik!! in actually fact, we always had to eat instant noodle, our usual food consumption!! Then we break fast by sitting n eating on the floor, my aunts keep apologising tt we had to sit on the floor! DUH!! like i mind like tt.. furthermore, its better cos everyone gets to sit together2... n they're so sweet cos they know im coming n tt i dun eat porridge(yes! i really dun eat them since young!) so they cook fish n chips as well.....

Yest, i met Amir... ahhh my darling, my baby... gosh i miss him alot.. He finally book out. I think he's getting taller now... im feeling so short suddenly, but then again, im always short!! haha
OMG his arm so big now.... i guess its all cos of all the trainings la. Somehow i find him abit diff, so discipline now. I think the army brainwashed him too much. Im getting blur of the army codes, trainings and terminology.. haha! Luckily i do hv abit of NPCC background and knowledge of army fm my bro so i kinda know some trainings like air rifle range and some commands, rules n procedures. If not, i be so lost n probably be bored.

Haha.. he looks so funny wif botak head... wahaha... small head,big body!! haha but its ok, he's still my baby. I think its looks ok with army uniform but kinda weird with normal clothes on. Well, basically i juz met him at Tamp, den back to Hougang to change, den Toa Payoh den to PS to catch a movie: Resident Evil. Movie was cool, nice.... full house man!! I screamed in shock at certain scenes... haha.. hilarious. Oh btw, we both break fast in the movie itself cos it started at 6.55pm. After movie, go eat at LJS n tts it. Gosh.. so fast... missing him already...

oh btw... iTS A SMALL WORLD!! yeah true its it! there's so many pple whom i found out r actually related to me, either thru frens or by blood or family ties... Its been a great suprise to find out there's alot more suprises in days to come.... it'll be great if i was somehow liked up with everyone .. haha

sob sob.. so sad i didnt realise one of my earrings dropped!! argh.. tt always happens to me. Argh i like it so much, futhermore its a beautifully butterfly earrings fm topshop n given by my frens as a bday gift! so sad....

im supposed to start studying now.....
it so worrying cos exams ard the corner.... i still hadnt started studying.. haha not in a study mood.. i'll switch to the study mode once sunday is over...
mum, dad n sis went to JB while im supposedly to be studyin now,haha.. i'll use exams as an excuse not to follow.... naughty me!
later meeting Amir for awhile at Tamp, he booking in back to camp tonight. Sob sob

Ramadhan coming...

hmmm today's the last time i'll be able to eat in daytime...
ramadhan coming... soon... actually TOMOLO!! wahaha.... Wow time flies!! Soon its gonna be Hari Raya den comes my ITP!!

I dunno why i been eating alot today... non-stop man. dun understand also. Is it cos im hungry? cravings? cos tomolo fasting? menses? hmmm ... i think menses coming la... haiz...
Exams coming too!! wahahaha.. dunno y im not so worried also.. Im not worried at all man!! Being not worried makes me worried sometimes!! haha... i sound so complicatin now.. Haha
Heck dun care la.. exams only 50%. Can make it la.

Haiz... can wait for Sat. I wanna see my Baby!! i miss him alot... alot alot...

Vote for Idol!! Taufik... Yay!

i went hm early today.. did abit of shopping again!! hehhe... never got sick of it.... dunno how much i spent already.. muahaha!! must start saving already. oh btw, i bought presents for my 2 cuzzinz n my aunt. Today's my aunt n my cuz Huda's bday.
Gosh, Huda is only exactly a week younger than me!! n my poor aunt getting a divorce, feel sad for her cos her 4 kids all still so young... so i bought ferrerro rocher for her!! to give her some comfort...
My other cuz Nani bday tomolo, she's my aunt's child... ahh so nice... my aunt got Nani on the next day of her(Aunt) bday! So sweet.....

Jus now watch S'pore Idol!!! Disco night?? my gosh, disaster man... they're horrible man! got no disco 'feel' expt towards the end... hmmmm, TAUFIK's great man. Now tts disco baby!! Olinda good too, Maia.. fuhh she's got great stage performance! All others, sorry but BOOO!!!
Maia, cool hmm not bad she made me change my mind bout her already, she gd too.
I've always supported Taufik from the start!! He's cool man... he's so Usher.. hehe... Yeah Baby!! he can danceand move like Usher too.. WoooHOO.... weweet... cedeh la!! Power babe...

I vote for him twice but I think im gonna vote for alot more. I dun want him out man, he's great. If u guys r reading this, vote now! its '8' to 43657....
Go taufik, go taufik......

Advice

i was jus reading thru the mail i send to Amir on 17 aug.. heart-breaking.
i realised i almost lost someone whom i love deeply, truely, whole heartedly.
My advice to all lovers out there, no matter how much u fight wif each other, do not break all ties.. jus take some time off and think... think carefully, thoroughly, deeply....

Splendid Saturday!! Rocks man!!

WOOO HOOOO!!!!!

wow.... im absolutely satisfied with how i spend my Saturday.... Ooooh weee!!! So exciting.... worth it baby!! Yeah yeah...

Sat's morning had to wake up so early.. Yawns! I slept so late on Fri cos came nack so late n still hv to wake up at 7am cos I meeting my Baby....
So tired but full of enthusiasm to visit an island... an island called Pulau Tekong. Haha...
I dun hv the admission ticket cos both taken up by his parents, luckily Latiffah called yest saying she got extra tix!! Thanks Fah.. Love u!! Oh btw, her bf Shah also same company as Amir.

My visit supposed to be a suprise cos i didnt tell him im coming... he really wants me to come but i persistently rejected cos his mum coming. Now tt im not coming, both his parents going. The problem is, no one expt for Fah n Shah knows im coming.
So when i reach there, i couldnt find him. Uncontactable. All his bunkmates' hp r off n so is his. I had a hard time trying to find him. Tired of looking for him everywhere.... Nowhere to be found.... I wanted to see his bunk to see if he's ard but i dun even known which is his bed!!! i only know Company Charlie, Platoon 4, level 5, Room? Bed? wahahahhaa.....

I look everywhere in desperation.. regretting this 'suprise'.. shd hv told him... i left the 2 lovebirds alone at the canteen while i continued my search. Walking everywhere like its my father's place... Haha!! Instead of finding Amir, I found alot of my other friends... they're all there... all diff company! Cool~
I broke down for awhile at the toilet.... so sad didnt get to meet him.... I walked up his bunk again at Level 5, my gosh LEVEL FIVE mind u!! to ask ard.... i found his bed no.! His bunkmates r all nice, telling me his bed.... I rushed down back to canteen to take my bag and went back to his bunk. I wrote him a note n left some chocs n stuff on his bed. Pple in the room all looking at me.... so paiseh... they look at me like they pity me like that... haha....

I left to toilet again... oh btw, when i enter the gal's toilet.. i was shock! i came out again to see the sign if its really a gal's toilet. True it is but there's guys thingy to pee standing there... heee~ went back to canteen but they're ready to leave for shah's bunk. Oh man, go back to bunk!!!But shah's at level 3. Moments later, my hp rings!!! Its AMIR!!! his voice is in excitement.... yay!! I met him later...

His presence elates me but his odour turn me off, he's been smoking!!! Always promise to try to stop but never did. My mood trash down. Then he insist me go to his bunk where his parents were.OMG!! Im in a trash mood n meeting his parents is not a gd combo!!! Stupid me dunno wat to do, jus smile sheepishly n keeping myslf busy wif hp.
Yah so tts it. a short meeting with my baby den i hv to leave cos last ferry at 12.30pm. Most of the time finding him... haiz... even if i found him earlier, its awkward cos his parents ard.

Went straight hm to eat n immediately sleep. So tiring. Woke up at 5pm to get ready for bbq pit at ECP,Noran's bday. Met Aisyah at tamp to buy presents. Bought her this cute door hanger... so cute! Meet Patrick, Iskandar n Sheedah at Bedok int to take bus to ECP. Shaz came shortly after. Exchanges of hugs n kisses of missing each other. Awwww.....
Cool~ reached there.... We ate alot.. really alot.. wahaha.. we're bunch of pple never eaten for days... wahahaha.... pple bbq we eat!!! EAT. Gary came later n soon, My whole gang of "good frens came"' My gosh, they're all so handsome now..... a pity im not in TP, if not everyday can meet them. wahahaa.. its like renunion. Gerek man!!-cool-

We talk n talk n eat n eat... My guy frens were all amazed at the rate im eating.. wahahaha.. im a dinosaur, eat like more than 8 rounds!! Cool to catch up with old frens, den talk bout the past.... so funny to think back the gd old days where everyone so mishievious... we've got alot of memories together cos we're so naughty last time. High profile class... full of famous monkeys n trashy students!!

We all packed up n cleared everything at 2.45am. But still gossipping n talking trash. alot went hm already only left me, Sheeda, Patrick, Yana, Iskandar, Gary. We anticipate patiently at McCafe playing cards n talking nonsense again, till 6am where there no midnight charge. I love everybody, gonna miss them again.......

This is officially the first day in 20yrs of my life i stayed over outside n came hm so late. WOO HOO!
Yana's a sweetie, she talked to my mum till she agrees... Love ya gal!

Fabulous Friday

heee.... finally gone out with my bestfren, Yana.. Haiz.. been a long time i went out with her. Tt day was Friday... Was so happy on Friday!!! Yay... Feel so good to be 20 huh?

Anyway, Yana c alled me tt morning... the conversation dragged on till im so late i had to rush to sch n took taxi which cost me $15... OMG... waste money man but its ok la.... once in awhile waste money.. wahahaha...
Yana's fault la... talk so much den ask me wear nice nice, ask me wear make-up la, wear heels la, wear feminine la... she's always complaining tt i look too young, too casual, too 'student'.... heehehee... haiz... she say she look more like my sis rather than my bestfren.. hahaha

We went to eat n window shopping too!! oh great.. SHOPPING!! again!! *smiling*
Tt day we both both identical silver big earrings... hehe... her treat. Oh btw, I got 2 more presents!! Woohoo... a cardigan fm yana n green necklace fm wendy. Understand y yana bought me tt.. wanna be more feminine n more 'grown up'... hehhee
She dun like me in my sneakers n t-shirts.. wahaha! I find myself cute in it, simple so.. I aint gonna change tt.. BOO! but i can see myself being a little mature in dressings la as compared to last time......
Oh... i bought myself another skirt n a t-shirt... Im so happy...

OH YEAH BABY!!! all projects submitted.. uh huh .. uh huh.. yeah yeah.. LETS GO PARTY!! yeah yeah... wahahaha... left one more presentation to go! CM.... oh yeah.. cool~

Happy Birthday to ME!!

Happy birthday to u
Happy birthday to u
Happy birthday to Azizan
Happy birthday to u!!

hmmm ... wat can i say!! Im older now. Gosh im 20 already!! really?? yah really... face it azizan.. Ur 20! its ok.. not tt old la. 20 is fine, im still young at heart n i look young... hehhee..

Well... i wont say its fantastic today but its definitely not bad at all...
OMG im so overwelmed by the pple who personally smiles, wishing me happy birthday or calls me up or sms me... oh my, overmelming responses n i thought not many would actually remembered... Every single wishes, call or even sms jus instantly makes me smile!! Its the thoughts that counts!!!
Some sang me birthday songs, some gave me wise advice, some gave me presents.... tts the extras.... but still i'll treasure small things pple done for me.
I lost count on how many pple made me smile today....

although didnt do much today, im happy.. contented...
last night i bought myself a slice of blackforest cake and delifrance fruit tartlet n ate them at exactly 12midnight... seconds after tt, my hp didnt stop beeping!! One by one pple wishing me happy birthday. WOW!! who was the person who wishes me first?? Amir Hamzah, my darling.. his sms was right on time.... 00:00:05 oh wow 5 seconds only.... He has been the first person to wish me happy bday for 3 consecutive yrs!! (no kidding! even when we're not yrt 2gether)
anyway, woke up early today but was late cos im dressing up for sch... feel kinda dumb cos im not going anywhere. Dress up for wat??!!
Jus did Flash MX in lab after sch... wow im amazed by the design i made.. its so cool... wow.... love it. Put alot of effort in it.
Then went back to Tamp Mall for dinner with sis at Breeks. I gave her a treat.. So filling but ex la... Hmmm... bought mum long john silver n fried cockle kuay teow for dad. Go window shopping n tts it. I watched tv thereafter.

No cake today, no candles blown..... but had mine 2 weeks back.

Oh i received presents.. WOW!! ferrerro roche n postcard by iqbal and 3 DDP tops n mini card from yaz!! wow... so suprised n touched by it.... hehe... this add on to the sandals, escada, fila bag, personalisedbday card, perlini silver bracelet, roxy photo album and mini skirt. WOW WOW WOW!

Im gonna be 20 soon

Oh gosh! My birthday in 2 days time!! IM GONNA BE OLD!! argh! no more 'teen', im soon gonna be twenty. Cant i be a 'twentyteen'? wahahahaha....

hmmmm.... 7 oct, thursday... wat should i do?? i really am not sure wat to do... no plans, no plans at all!!! All i know, i dun wanna do any work on tt day... hehe. Im gonna be a princess; no housework, no schoolwork, no stress, no projects!! Enough enough already... I WANT PEACE!!! I WANNA BE HAPPY.... Whoever dares to make me do work on tat day, tts it!! There's gonna be a war... wahahhaa... I shall command all my men to get ready n fight, kill whoever dares go against me cos Im the princess. Crappy... ~weeee~

Haiz.. sianz... Am I cursed or wat?? Everytime my bday, I dun hv a boyfren with me... I mean ya i do hv one now but he's in camp. I was only lucky to celebrate my bday last yr with Amir... All my other bdays, Im without boyfrens!! Y? They dun wanna give me present is it?? Hehehe. But Im well... kinda contented with the advance presents i received... oh wow!! *smile*

Oh btw, wat shall i get myself this year?? hmmmm ... a earring?? a watch?? cute socks?? shoes?? clothes n more clothes?? yippies!!! SHOPPING!! i love this word alot!! Later decide la... must suprise myself, so i think i'll get watever catches my eyes when I shop.... *big smiles*
Im so thick-skinned, i ask my close frens out to hang out on my bday. Where got pple's bday ask pple out? It shd be the other way round Hehehe... Too bad for me... all of them busy la... Sob sob... Was kinda sad la... Dun dare ask other frens already, paiseh ah. Once bitten, twice shy.

Right now, still thiking of wat to do. Watch a movie?? but with who??? Hmmm... Yaz ask me out but i dun wan la, so much risk involved. He jus confess he still hv feelings for me n his gf will go after me but more importantly Im still true to Amir... I miss him alot. I want a hug!!
Anyway... wat to do?? wat to do?? hmmmm, i jus know i'll buy a slice of cheesecake n a choc cake(cos im 20) n eat ard midnight, then i'll wake up early in the morning to catch the sunrise.. dress up for sch, thl presentation n lect n after tt i'll chill.. maybe in sch for awhile den roam somewhere(i really dunno) den back at hm to catch apprentice n the OC. Oh i wanna eat alot... alot alot.. really alot... hehehe.....

Lets jus see if plans work out or something else(gd/bad) happen... *wonders*

Tiring day Yesterday

So Sick n Tired!!

Went to Sentosa yest... I was so sick.. keep sneezing. Gosh! i dunno y i am even there in the first place. Felt super tired, jus feel like sleeping but cant. I have a responsibility in doing proj. haiz.. Didnt really do much actually. The Dragon Trail racky wasnt as tough as it used to be but maybe i was jus racing for time last time. Cant believe that Im sick but I still go ahead for sun tanning.. haha. If it wasnt for my flu, I would hv jump into the waters!!! I love the beach... Cant blame me, I grew up with it.

I'm more tanned now. Hopefully, pple notice that. I jus hope pple stop conversing Mandarin to me cos its so irritating. Let me repeat myself, IM MALAY.

I also realise that I would need more formal or office clothes for my ITP. haiz.. where to get money??? Im so dead, last month hp bill still not completely settled. Haiz, next bill coming soon n im expecting the bill to be more cos use alot.
Oh btw, I just bought a BUM equipment bag n tops last nite... Hehe... no money but still buy unnecessary stuff. I've gotta learn to prioritize more. Wat to do..... Shopping was my first love.. Sick n tired but i'll always have time for shopping. Hehe.. *winks*

ITP

hey!!! woo hoo... got my itp placement. Elated. I got into East West Executive Travellers!!! Yay! Gosh tts suprising. But it was good news. I was juz waiting for back-up companies cos I know i didnt do well for both. Then for Insights Vacation Pte Ltd, I dun like it cos they wan me to do computer stuff. Yucks!!

Im so lucky.. yeah find myself so lucky man!! Out of 7 who went for interview, im one of the 3 choosen. Despite me being in bad mood, having difficulty sitting still, wearing striking lime green socks that goes out of place.... I still got it. wahahahaha.... I guess a smile is always useful, im taking advantage of my smile n friendly personality. hehe!! n i think the blazer helps too! i guess tt gave me an edge. I dunno how they choose but im happy now.

Ven go into Tradewinds n Jo got Diners, they're both happy!! YY got sheraton, not sure if she likes it la.....

Confused...

There's this guy named Fahmi, known him in Sp. He's in rock climbing too.. dun really know him tt well but he added me on friendster den we msg den he wrote me a testi. Weird cos we dun really know each other. I've seen him twice only, at stadium first time we met n at rock wall when there's a comp. Dunno la if he sees me ard. We chatted on msn n he calls me 'tembam' or chubby.... haiz... im so afraid he like me cos he say he find me cute. nah im overreacting la.... jus dun wan history to repeat itself... Amir hamzah, my one n only...

Then later, as i was busy chatting wif Fahmi, Yaz on msn... He msg den i dun realised. He like angry like tt. Den it turned out tt he has something to say, he's so sensitive... i really wonder if he's having PMS. He said he cant held it back anymore, must let it go. He miss me. I be so glad if he only miss me as a fren but he's not. Told me he had a dream of us being together. Gosh!!
I keep telling him im not interested n dun wanted anythin to happen wif him n his gal. I ask him to try to spend more time with her. I jus dun get it. He's the one who is keeping the distant away, ignoring me n now telling me tt all these while he's been resisting n helding back his feelings for me. Well too bad, I never loved him. I liked him, yes, but not now. He couldnt even acknowledge me as a fren to his gal. Haiz... n he got no guts. Dun dare to talk to his gal, he's like under control. I dun like tt kind of guy. Dunno la, he keep sayin now im like ignoring him, didnt sms or call him. I told him off by saying tts wat he did last time. Good la, now he feels wat i feel last time.

All i can say is tt im not doing anythin to harm my relationship with Amir. He's given me the trust i wanted so im not taking advantage of it. I wil always love my baby...

Bimbo is great.... hehe

i didnt go for my napfa today. blew it man.
nvm la, i didnt train for it anyway. n its raining jus now...

i was on the way hm, n was sitting next to this guy mly guy.
Haha... his discman so loud, i got free music....

Meet up with Shaz jus now. She's looking great. Slim n toned body. N she's so tanned. I love her skin.... She's the type i wanna be cos she exercise all the time. Im not into skinny gals... i find them disgusting.. hahha... She's great, still as fun bubbly n bimbotic... haha tts my Shaz! We had cakes n drink at Coffee Bean n chill... talk talk.... She's such a bimbo the way she speaks but i love it! i get influenced by her too... can say im being so bimbotic when im with her. We'll go like, "hmmm oh yah honey.... u cant do tt cos tt's so wrong... uh huh, u gotta listen to me... like TOTALLY!!!" wahahahaha.... i cant believe im so bitchy...

oh ven having prob now.... i jus knew it would happen.. i feel for her. It wouldnt be easy for her but at least she gets to feel wat is it to be in love. She's asking for a break at this very moment. Hope things turn out fine for her. I miss my real darling Venassa Lum cos she's not been herself.. always seen in deep thoughts n bad mood n troubled.