Lost Soul

its an every year kinda thing tt i always do during the festive seasons....
every year, i'll walked down to orchard road to see the light up, decor, christmas trees everywhere, pple ard, music playing here n here....
its jus gonna be different this year....

i went to orchard yest..... alone...
walking aimlessly.... like a lost soul....
i didnt even cover half of orchard road, i jus wanna leave the place
its painful.... im tired... really tired of flashbacks....

you're flying so high while im falling.... falling deeper n deeper
...... rotting inside.....
im trying hard to live....
trying hard to make myself be ok....
happy moments doesnt last long.... the sufferings are never ending....

gt my photos today... yucks! i look so fat n ugly... hated it!

i knock off w/o even removing my make-up, lens or change my clothes.....
my brain n heart couldnt bear with the pain, its torturing.... exhausting me alot
i woke up at 4am, blinded by my lens.... eyes hurts so bad, its blinding me
panicked-stricken, i tot i wld be blind... vision is blurrer by the day....